Someone out there a long time ago, decided that the “natural” order of events goes something like this: you fall in love, get married, settle down, then have a child or two (or three, or however many).
But that isn’t everyone’s story. Sometimes people don’t find “the one” they’re supposed to be with until later in life, and by then, raising a kid when you’re past a certain age can feel like you’ve missed a window. (You haven’t, but that’s a discussion for another time.)
If you want children, have children.
We know, it sounds easy when we say it like that. Let us put it another way. Have you ever heard the old saying, “The best time to plant a tree was 10 years ago, the second-best time is now”?
If you’re waiting to meet “the one” so you can begin to build your family, then you might miss out on all the awesomeness that is your path to parenthood.
Here are some famous single fathers who dared to become Dads while single.
Andy Cohen
The Bravo! television producer waited until he was 50 years old before he started his family. Now, the star has two children, Benjamin (born Feb. 2019) and Lucy (April 2022). While Cohen has been romantically linked in rumors to pop star John Mayer, Andy is in fact single. You might even catch him on your favorite dating apps. Cohen told a magazine that he’d had the desire to be a father his entire life. Both children were born through different surrogates but shared the same egg donor.
Perez Hilton
The famous media personality is also famously a single dad to three children. The former gossip columnist has one son and two daughters, and all born via surrogacy and egg donation. The eldest is a boy named Mario and was born February 13, 2013. His first daughter Mia was born in May 9, 2015 and his second daughter Mayte was born in October 4, 2017. Hilton chose the path to parenthood as a single father and continues to raise his kids on his own. All three children share the same egg donor, who Hilton said he chose “because she seemed nice.”
Ricky Martin
No one can doubt that once Ricky Martin came out of the closet, he has lived his life fully. (One might even say he’s ‘Livin La Vida Loca’.) The mega star has long dreamed of having a big family and by the time he hit his 38th birthday, he was still single and didn’t want to wait any longer. In 2008, Martin’s surrogate gave birth to twin sons, Matteo and Valentino, who were both born via surrogacy and egg donation. Several years later, Martin would marry artist Jwan Yosef, and the couple would have two more children together. However, the couple split up and co-parent these days.
Joseph Tito
The writer, producer, and director wrote a beautifully and touching piece for Newsweek that outlined his entire path to parenthood as a single, gay man. Initially, he writes, he was starting the journey with a partner with whom he was in a long-distance relationship, that partner faded from the picture and he embarked on the journey entirely alone. He says that his children, Stella and Mia, are the center of his world and the source of his greatest love. Both children were born via surrogacy and egg donation.
Matt Bonnen
The social media star (@mattybonbon on Instagram and TikTok) decided to have a child of his own when his four-year relationship ended. After losing his own brother in an accident, and a cancer scare of his own, Bonnen decided that he was tired of waiting, and wanted to start building a family. So he did. He calls it the best decision of his life. For Bonnen, he initially tried adoption but he couldn’t find an agency that would work with a single, gay dad. So that was why surrogacy and egg donation worked for him.
These are just examples, some of the more famous ones, of gay single dads.
Your journey is valid. Your concerns are valid. Your parenthood instincts are valid. You can do this. Let us help.
